Here Be Monsters.
Oh yes. Everywhere. Even if you grow up the monsters wont go away. They just moved out from under your bed and into/onto governmental authorities, hijacked jockeys, everyday-Joes and Jovelinas, dark back alleys and even, yes even, friends.
I am not that scared of the dark in particular. I am scared of change. Why this has come to be a curse (yeah well perhaps not a curse as much as a fobia, eventhough I feel that the word “fobia” is perhaps a little bit to steep a word for such a description) of mine I dont know. But that is, as they say (whoever they are), as it is. It also seems it cannot be helped since I have constantly, throughout my life, put myself in positions where change is inevitably the only prefered outcome of a situation. But still change scares the beejeezes out of me.
This has posed as a little bit of a problem for me in my past relationships thoward fellow companions and friends. You see, I dont want them to change. Well, ofcourse I dont want them to stagnate in progression or not evolve. I just do not want them to…change into grownups, or whatever you might wanna call it. To mature is, in my opinion, not to grow up. I know that I am comming off as a little bit uva Peter Pan complex here but bare with me for a spell will ya.
So, they grow up, and as they do the freedom of youth seem to wither away in their hearts. They let their lives, once again, become compromised by the monsters under the bed. Only this time, as I stated above, the monsters dont live under the bed. They live in money. Or in fear of not having/loosing. They live in the fear of not being enough in the eyes of their spectators. We impose ur monsters on our surroundings and it is a fucking sad thing.
All of those things matter none.
But we think they do. So we loose ourselves in the pursuit of understanding the things around us that seem so abstract that we take them for pure thruths. Instead of trying to understand ourselves. The only thing we actually have a shot at truly understanding.
The saddest thing is loosing someone dear through their incompetence of not realising what is real and true: themselves.
Anyway my life has changed drastically the last month since I moved from Gothenburg to Paris. I have alot of agendas with this epic change in the life of me and I might share those further on. Be it by Art or more pretentious blog-ranting.
Still working on hard on different projects though: new El Huervo record, a small iPad game, paintings and Miman.
Miman even got its own section so I suggest you check it out if you wanna know more about what that is about.
Cant paint in my flat though so I am currently looking for a place to do that before I loose my joints. But perhaps this absence of painting has been good for me since a new big, I dont know what to call it but lets call it mission, mission (yeah its supposed to be that way, I did not write two times like that just for kicks. If it does not make sense to ya just read the sentence again) has started to take form in the corners of my mind. Some of the ArtWork for Miman actually spurred this notion and they will serve as the start of a lot of elaborate sketches for this new artistic path.
Cant wait til I find a place to paint…
I´ll enclose two of the sketches below so you can have a looksee at what is to come.
So if my ranting did not make any sense to you it will all become clear in due time.
If not, well then I guess you must have bumped into the wrong website.